Barbara was the oldest of three sisters along with my mum Maureen and Enid. They lived in Preston with their mum and dad Jack and Edie Saunders.

I didn’t know my grandad, he died before I was born. He was a stonemason. A skilled, hardworking Northerner. Barbara adored him. I guess she inherited her Northern grit, strength of character and sense of humour from him.

After going to college Barbara worked for a legal firm in Preston before moving to live near Liverpool and later down to Chesham where she worked for Amersham International.

Barbara was so very special to me. She was my Aunt and my Godmother. She was my sounding board and voice of reason and I loved her.
I still do.
I can’t believe she is no longer in our life.

She was also much loved by my cousins Nick, Johanna and Stephen and had 7 great nieces and nephews including my little boy Dexter.

She adored her little sister Enid. And was very protective of her. She visited California regularly and they went off on some great adventures together. When Barbara and I went to California in 1998 the three of us went down to Cabo St Lucas in Mexico for a girls holiday. It was fab, I remember going round the little street markets and having a few cheeky cocktails in the evening. Bliss.

I always remember her naughty sense of humour, total irreverence and biting wit. She made me laugh with her stories and tales of going away with her girl friends from her Preston days and always kept in touch with them. She was always up for a laugh.

She was so very good at keeping in touch with our family. She really was the glue that kept us together. 

And we were so blessed to have a last family gathering in Paris at the end of June this year. Despite being so poorly she was determined to be there. There’s a photo of us together on the order of service. It is a precious memory.

If I was to sum up Barbara I would say she was the strongest woman, fiercely independent, no-nonsense, down to earth, wickedly funny, loyal, hardworking and a great friend. A typical Northern Lass.

She hated being called Auntie - I learnt that very early on - just call me Barbara - auntie makes me feel old! Later on I sometimes teased her about being my fairy godmother - I won’t repeat what she said!

On my 18th birthday she sent me some money and wrote in the card - just buy yourself some nice frilly knickers! She was so funny!

She was a big kid at heart. Kids liked Barbara - she made them laugh, and enjoyed their sense of ridiculous. She taught my boy Dexter to blow raspberries when he was only a few months old and he’s never stopped since! Thanks Barbara I alway think of you every time!

This really is the hardest thing to do. Saying goodbye to someone you’ve loved for so long is so hard and it feels so final, like nothing will be the same again. I guess it never will.

When I got the news I was dreading on November 22, I dropped to the floor in the kitchen. I was on the phone to Deirdre who, with Sue was with her at the end. I just broke down. 

My little boy was with me in the kitchen. We said our goodbyes to Barbara and Dexter told her he loved her. When I came off the phone I saw that Dexter had written me this note.

It said - You are so brave...

Later that night he was crying and said - I’m so sad mummy, I love Barbara - she was a great Nana and I miss her already. I don’t ever want to forget her but it really hurts.

I held him and asked - the pain - do you feel it deep in your heart? He said yes. I said - That shows that you loved her and her spirit is still with you. She will never be forgotten while her spirit lives on in your heart.

So for all of us who hold a little bit of Barbara in our heart, she will never be forgotten and the values she shared, the love she showed, the fun you got up to or the raspberries you blew will never leave you.

You are so brave - and Barbara would be very proud of you.

Kelsey xxxx