Barbara was born in Preston in 1936 the eldest of 3 children, all girls.   Her father who was a stone mason, had to retire early through ill health, and as a consequence her mother found work to support the family.  Barbara then became a caring little mother to her 2 sisters Maureen and Enid.

After school Barbara went to college, acquired secretarial skills, and had a number of jobs, one of which was in Liverpool where she met Alan.  Alan’s 2 boys, Clive and Michael lived with them and they were a happy family.

In 1972, Alan and Barbara came south and Barbara found employment at the Radiochemical Centre in Little Chalfont.  She became the secretary to the manager of the Quality Control Department, Dr Russell Bayley and her role was crucial to the smooth running of the place.  Some would joke that it was really Barbara who was in charge. 

1973 was a time of expansion for the company and a number of graduates straight from university were recruited, of which I was one. Barbara was very caring to us new recruits, helping us to settle in and learn the ropes.  But it was not long before we saw another side to her. She was forthright and certainly not afraid to speak her mind. Both junior and senior members of staff got the sharp edge of her tongue on occasion.  I know one senior member of the department, who would approach Barbara with trepidation if he wanted something altered on a report that she had typed for him.

Barbara embraced the social side of the department, organising Christmas parties, events and inter departmental sport.  She played darts and was a member of The Radiochemical Centre ladies darts team which played in the Chalfont and District league.  It was on a January night in 1984 when we were scheduled to play an away match that I received a phone call from her to say that she wouldn’t be coming as Alan had just come in from a run and had collapsed.  It turned out that Alan had had a massive heart attack and sadly did not survive.

Barbara adjusted to life as a single. She had no family living nearby; her sister Enid was in America and her other sister Maureen, had sadly died aged 31 with an undiagnosed ectopic pregnancy.  She threw herself into her work, and also decided that she would like to take up golf.  She had lessons, and was soon an active member of the Ley Hill Golf Club where she made lots of friends.  She was also a member of the works golf team.

It was after Alan’s death that I would invite Barbara to join the family for an occasional meal.  This soon became invitations to join us for family parties, Easter, Christmas weddings, baptisms and so on.  My family opened their arms to her and she became an adopted family member.  She also came on holiday with us on a number of occasions.  One when we were holidaying in the S of France she brought her American niece Joanna with her. Joanna has written to say and I quote ‘Barbara would take me on lovely holidays around England and France, creating memories that I will always cherish.’

Barbara retired from work at the age of 63.  She had been in the same department since joining the company and in that time had worked for a number of senior managers. I know Russel Bayley her first and Brian Harding, her last, were special to her.  She joined, The Amersham Pensioners Association, and this enabled her to stay in contact with work colleagues.  She continued to play golf until she started to get problems, firstly with her hip joint and then her knees.  She also took up bowling and was an active member of a local bowls club.  She really enjoyed bowling, and the trips away to “Potters”, which were mini holidays with bowling matches thrown in.

Over the years Barbara’s nephews and nieces, Kelsey, the Americans, Nick, Stephen and Joanna visited her, and they were a joy in her life.  Kelsey said that she always remembers Barbara’s naughty sense of humour, her total irreverence and biting wit and that she made her laugh with her tales of going away with her girlfriends from her Preston days.  In June this year Nick arranged a big family get together in Paris for his 50^th birthday.  Barbara was ill, but was determined not to miss the occasion.  Enid flew to England and they both travelled together to Paris, and she did enjoy seeing everyone once more.

On returning from Paris, Barbara’s health continued to deteriorate.  Medically nothing could be done and she needed more and more support.  Pat who lived next door did her shopping, transported her to the doctor, the hospital, or anywhere Barbara needed to go.  Another neighbour Sue would invite Barbara for meals, and would also leave Barbara meals that she could microwave.  These are just 2, neighbours but I know there were others who were continually popping in.

In the last few weeks Barbara was supported by Sarah from ‘By your Side’ and Ian Rennie Nurses, and she spent her final days in the Hospice of St Francis.  She said to me that she thought the care she was receiving was the best, and we all know how critical Barbara could be – so the best really was the best.  Barbara died peacefully in her sleep the evening of 22^nd November.  My sister Deirdre and I were with her, and through Face Time we were able to link up to the family in America and they were all able to say goodbye.

Barbara’s nephew Nick is unable to be with us today but he asked for these following words to be read out

“Barbara, we have enjoyed visiting you in England over the years, as well as having you visit here. As a kid, I remember vacationing in Chesham, and every morning taking the dogs for a walk across the field, picking mushrooms and bringing them home for breakfast.  I remember that time we all walked across the fields one afternoon to the pub and Stephen insisted on trying a pint of beer. You bought him one and he got sick.  I’m sorry that I can’t be there, but know that you were a very special aunt and we will miss you.”

On behalf of Barbara’s family I would like to extend thanks to everyone who helped care for Barbara over this last difficult year. 

You are all invited to Chartridge Park Golf club afterwards for refreshments when there will also be an opportunity to hear tributes from Barbara’s nieces Kelsey and Joanna.

Barbara’s last words were that we should not be sad, but go and have a party, so do come.

Sue Finch

13^th December 2018